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Dark corners of the language: clichés

February 1st 2010 05:17
bloggercises pen

We have in the past advised novice writers against using clichés. There no known excuse to use a cliché, we said. There is no imaginable circumstance in the occupied universe, we advised, that can justify using a cliché.


Well, we got that wrong.

John Croucher has just published a book full of clichés, and every one of them is justified.

Croucher is a professor at Australia’s Macquarie Graduate School of Management, and his book is more about the business world than grammar. The book’s dedication is to ``all those suckers who believe everything people tell them''.

However, Bloggercises got attentive on behalf of writers and anyone interested in language when Croucher asserted that clichés often exist today because they are used as a way to disguise meaning. To put it plainly, Croucher says clichés often mean the opposite of what they look like they mean.

Sound crazy? We thought so too. So here are some examples, and after reading them it is apparent that Croucher has cleverly identified something here.

Cliché: Are you making a fashion statement?
Real meaning: You look ridiculous.

Cliché: Our company is containing costs.
Real meaning: Our company is maximising management salaries and bonuses and minimising the wages of everyone else.

Cliché: You deserve better than me.
Real meaning: I want better than you.


Cliché: Our company is seeking a self-starter.
Real meaning: In this role, nobody is going to help you whatsoever.

Cliché: This is a challenging role.
Real meaning: Everyone is going to hate you.

Cliché: This property is a golden opportunity.
Real meaning: This property is a golden opportunity for the agent to make a commission.

Croucher says the reverse cliché phenomenon is a result of a competitive world. They are, he says, “a form of modern punishment”.

``I watch a lot of TV and read a lot of papers and, being in management school, I get a lot of management speak paradigm shifts and synergies: tools for punishing people,'' he said.

``But because this is a dog-eat-dog world, because we need to get that competitive edge, we lie more. A lot of people look good on paper, because people tell us what we want to hear. People lie all the time, and others believe them because they want to.”

In other words, clichés are corporate or self-promoting double-speak, and most of us fall for it.

Caveat emptor.


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The power of a writer

January 31st 2010 02:49
oval office

My novel, which is developing at the pace of a geriatric glacier on Jupiter, nevertheless provides moments of great satisfaction.

The freedom to create is one of the great attractions of writing. Most people escape from the real world through moments of casual dreaming. When there is nothing more pressing to do, they win a million dollars, or attract someone with a million-dollar smile, and the mind's eye then spends some money or some moments in sweet contemplation of consequent pleasures.

Such dreams are usually brief and short on detail. If the dreamer were capable of adding colour and emotion, providing personalities and describing the commodities to be bought or the kisses to be savoured, then that person is a natural story teller and is probably already reaching for a keyboard.

This week, as part of the development of my novel, I visited the White House. I was a little shocked, at first, at my audacity, but I walked right into the Oval Office and told the President what I wanted him to do and what I wanted him to say. Then I told him his name, something he hadn't known until that moment. He didn't argue — he didn't disagree with any of my decisions. He knew I was completely in charge.

It was a good writing day.

The only person more powerful than a writer is another writer with a bigger imagination. There is nothing in the universe a writer can not do. Except make glaciers on Jupiter travel faster.



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google christmas
A year ago, I wrote a post over at NewlyOld entitled "Christmas and the finer points of Cockney".

It was inspired by my 80-something father in law, to whose generation this fun and quirky alphabet of rhyming slang is well-known. The post (which you can see here if interested) proved a comparatively big hit on a small and sparsely populated blog.

I have posted intermittently on NewlyOld in the ensuing year, and its readership has risen only moderately to a regular 200 to 300 hits a day, with a high of 589 hits.

That record was smashed two days ago. On Christmas Eve I was surprised to see a hit count for NewlyOld of 996. This was all the more surprising as I hadn't posted to the blog for almost two months.

Spikes in blog readership like this are invariably caused by one of two things: either someone has linked to your blog post on their own blog, or through StumbleUpon or a similar favourite flagging site; or an old post has suddenly become topical and a therefore a popular search engine subject.

The way to find out what has caused your stat spike is to scroll down your Orble traffic email to Referral Stats, which will show you what is creating all the fuss.

In my case with NewlyOld, the fuss was created by nothing more than an increase in people around the world Googling the word Christmas. Just under 1,000 of them found me. Ain't blogging fun!




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A new word for an old feeling

December 21st 2009 06:52
obama hu jintao copenhagen
In news which perhaps sums up a year which was unfriendly to the global economy, to the environment, to developing nations and to the remaining optimists who had faith that our leaders were capable of leading, we hear that a senior lexicographer has chosen "unfriend" as the word of the year.

It's a new word which Planet Earth knows well


[ Click here to read more ]
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bloggercises pen

English is simple, right? Where French and Italian makes things difficult with two forms of the definite article, masculine and feminine, and German makes things even tougher by throwing in neuter, English uses just one word. The. Isn't that easy?

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brain

The blogosphere has been abuzz for some time now watching the rise and rise of the Consumption Malfunction blog.

[ Click here to read more ]
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A writer's tool kit: redundancies

September 22nd 2009 23:56
bloggercises pen

Some follow-up thoughts reinforcing yesterday's post on the issue of overused words, which is a subset of the broader subject of redundancies.

[ Click here to read more ]
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A writer's tool kit: overused words

September 22nd 2009 00:27
bloggercises pen

Consider the following two paragraphs:

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Word of the day: chronovore

September 11th 2009 00:32
wasting time

Chronovore: something which eats your time.

[ Click here to read more ]
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Write and wrong

September 3rd 2009 04:07
vitreous humour

The aim of the first paragraph of any text, be it a blog post or a doctoral thesis, is to tempt the reader to venture forward to the second paragraph. Etcetera.

[ Click here to read more ]
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